


you're not trapped

by anticlimactic



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Episode: s06e16 Triggers, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-06
Updated: 2017-09-06
Packaged: 2018-12-24 11:52:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12012153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anticlimactic/pseuds/anticlimactic
Summary: “Why do you think I had to knock you out, like 5 times? You kept waking up, thinking you were trapped,” Theo said, eyes flickering to Liam, but quickly away. He pressed his lips together, and continued. “You’re not trapped. You- you don’t have to fill Scott’s place, or be the perfect alpha or whatever.”





	you're not trapped

**Author's Note:**

> set after 6.16 triggers when liam and theo are driving home from the zoo. i've seen a few similar works but i can't get enough thiam so here you go!  
> the beginning dialogue is from the show itself, and then my interpretation of the rest :)

Liam woke up and instantly squeezed his eyes shut, groaning. Maybe “woke up” wasn’t the right phrase. More like slammed into consciousness uninvited. His head hurt like hell, and his eyes burnt even in the dimness. Scratches healed quick, but a couple fists to the head didn’t always feel too great right away. He scrubbed a hand over his face and sensed his body in motion, realizing he was in the passenger seat of Theo’s truck. How he had gotten there was unclear, but Liam had vague recollections of Theo’s hands on his forearms pushing him to the forest floor. 

As if to confirm, Theo glanced over at him and said, “I had to knock you out.”

“Yeah how many times?” Liam muttered. One punch didn’t warrant the soft ringing in his hears that just wouldn’t seem to go away.

“Five.” Theo had an amused smile on his face, and it faded into a wistful turn of the lips.

Liam sighed, regretting his poor judgement. The zoo had seemed like a good idea, but he couldn’t shake the memories that came with those cages. At the time it had been the lowest blow, for Brett to pretend like he was some kind of animal. Now, Liam couldn’t help but feel more animal everyday. He couldn’t save Brett, he knew that too, it was too late. But the town had seen him over Brett and Lori’s bodies, and it didn’t make a difference if Liam had killed them or not. He knew he was capable of that kind of violence, and the thought scared him.

“I almost killed him, didn’t I?” Liam mumbled, cradling his bloodied hands in front of him. The claws were gone, but the monster was still there inside. 

Theo took his eyes of the rode to look at Liam again. “Almost,” he said, “But you broke your hands trying not to.”

Liam scoffed. As if that made a difference. His hands had done things plenty more violent than attacking Nolan. After all, he’d tried to kill his own alpha. “I guess that’s something,” he lied, shaking his head imperceptibly and looking out the window. 

“Next time you come up with a plan like this, pick a place that doesn’t trigger a murderous rage,” Theo said with his usual sarcasm. Liam felt himself relax a bit at the familiarity, banter with Theo he could handle. The truth about his outburst, not so much. But he felt he owed as much to Theo.

“I didn’t know this was gonna happen,” Liam said honestly. He still couldn’t look at Theo, but the other boy seemed intent on trying to meet his gaze.

“Whether you meant it or not, you picked the spot,” Liam finally looked up to meet Theo’s stare, hearing the meaning in the chimera’s words. “You made the plan,” he continued, gaze shifting back to the empty forest road. “You wanted me to help.” Frustrated, Liam tried to understand the implication behind those words. It was true, he could’ve asked anyone for help. But Scott was busy breaking into Gerard’s armory, and he would never ask Mason to put himself in danger. So that left Theo… right?

“If I needed your help for anything, it’ll be so I get angry enough to kill you myself,” Liam responded, half-heartedly. They both knew Liam had plenty of opportunity to kill Theo, yet he had broken the sword that could’ve sent Theo back to hell. And defended Theo against the ghost riders. His threats just kept getting emptier.

“You brought me here because that thing that came out of the Wild Hunt is affecting you too,” Theo paused, before adding, “You- you need to figure this out before you completely lose it.”

Liam tried to rationalize, but the truth weighed on him with a sinking feeling. Why Theo had picked up on it, he didn’t know. Maybe he should be keeping his chemo-signals in check. “The Aunk-ite causes fear, it doesn’t cause anger,” he argued.

“People don’t only feel one emotion at a time, Liam. Which is why you get angry when you’re afraid,” Theo’s eyes were heavy on Liam’s profile, who was attempting to rub the dried blood from his shaking hands onto his stained jeans. “That’s why you almost tore Nolan’s head off,” Theo concluded.

Liam considered. “If the Anuk-ite can do this to me, what do you think it’s doing to everyone else?” Theo didn’t respond, which was an answer in itself. The Anuk-ite was capable of rooting deep fear, terror, into even the most mundane situations. If it poked and prodded at a pre-existing fear, results could be terrifying. The Aunk-ite must have been amplifying Liam’s lingering dread in being back at the abandoned zoo. He hadn’t been able to tell what was real and what was just his memories, resurfacing. It’s why he had gone psycho on Nolan. Not that Theo needed to know. The chimera was used to Liam’s anger, not his crippling fear. Anger was bold, fear vulnerable. For some reason Liam didn’t want to be seen as vulnerable by Theo. 

“I’ll drop you off at home,” Theo said, startling Liam from his thoughts. They must have already driven past the high school, and were now weaving through residential neighborhoods. Liam didn’t remember giving Theo his address but it seemed the boy was on his way there. 

“No,” Liam said quickly, then backtracked, embarrassed, “I mean… I just can’t go back right now. My parents, my dad… I’m not ready.” He cringed at his own words, but they were painfully true. What Liam didn’t admit was the intense panic he felt at the idea of being alone. Sure he had his parents, but they didn’t understand, they couldn’t really. Only the pack could really help him. But Theo wasn’t pack… was he?

“Relax, it’s fine. Just text Scott and let him know you’re coming over,” Theo replied easily. His hands gripped tightly at the wheel and he hadn’t turned to look over at Liam in a while, favoring his mirrors instead as if he was actually a careful driver. Although the two had made ends meet, Scott was still a touchy subject with Theo.

“Listen, can we just…” Liam shook his head and took a deep breath, trying to dislodge the lump forming in his chest. “Can we just drive around for a while?” His fingers tapped anxiously on his knee, and Liam tried to suppress his leaking fear that likely could be scented in his chemo signals.

“Trouble in paradise?” Theo mused, but he turned back onto the highway. The sight of endless trees and pavement eased Liam’s heart slightly. No one in sight that he could disappoint. 

“Scott can’t see me like this,” Liam mumbled, almost without meaning too. 

“What’s ‘this’?” Theo asked, and Liam could tell he wasn’t being mocking. Which made Liam’s words tangle even more in his lungs.

“Out of control,” Liam admitted. He was going to stop there, but the way Theo's eyes shifted towards him invited him to elaborate. “I don’t know… Scott’s the perfect alpha. He wants to save everyone, and he never gets angry, not even at the bad guys. I just…” he sighed and added quietly, fiddling with the cuffs of his t-shirt, “I just don’t think I can fill his place when he leaves.” He glanced at Theo, who was quiet. He scratched absently at the faux leather on the side door, letting the conversation drop. More trees raced past and Liam wondered if Theo had a destination in mind. 

After a few seconds, Theo asked softly, with something akin to his usual smugness, “And I can?” 

Liam didn’t understand, “What?”

“See you like this. Out of control,” He shrugged at Liam’s look. “Your words.”

Liam huffed, eyes back on the passing trees. “It’s different.” But why was it different? Scott was Liam’s alpha, the strongest bond possible. Liam looked up to Scott, was constantly trying to mimic his leadership and always seeming to come up short. He should be able to share anything with his alpha. But what was Theo? A chimera who’d torn out his sister’s heart and gone through hell and back? He didn’t understand why Theo could see this side of him but Scott couldn’t. Recently, when it came to Theo, there was a missing piece that Liam couldn’t place. Or didn’t want to.

“How so?” Theo’s lips quirked, that smirk Liam hated pulling upwards. His eyes, ordinarily a light gray, looked dark in the shadows of the truck.

“Scott… he’s like my brother,” Liam said, clutching his wrist and looking down, away from Theo.

“And what am I?”

Inexplicably, Liam blushed. He was thankful for the darkness as he deflected, “An asshole who’s really been getting on my nerves lately.”

Theo chuckled, but didn’t press to Liam’s relief. It was true, Theo had become something… else recently. Somehow a constant in Liam’s life, but the role he filled, Liam was yet to find out. At least he felt slightly calmer than he had after waking up with a pounding headache. The thing about Theo was he took Liam for who he was with no strings attached. If Liam told his parents, or even Scott or Mason, about the nightmares he’d been having lately, he knew they’d be concerned and Liam didn’t think he could deal with that. It’s not like they didn’t have problems of their own to worry about, and dealing with Liam’s were an unnecessary load he didn’t expect anyone to take.

But every time he closed his eyes, he saw himself as a monster, losing it and attacking Scott, or, terrifyingly, his parents or Mason. He saw himself intentionally killing Brett and Lori, wanting them dead, wanting Brett dead for what he had done to Liam in the cages. No doubt he would see Nolan’s face tonight. He shuddered, reminding himself it was the Anuk-ite messing with his mind, wasn’t it? But why did it not seem to be affecting Theo?

“You okay?” Theo asked. Liam hadn’t realized that his breathing had picked up. Or that his hands were trembling. He wiped his bloody knuckles again on his jeans to no avail. “Your heart beat is really fast.” 

Liam willed it to slow and forced out, “I’m fine.”

“You don’t have to be,” Theo shrugged, earnestly, looking over at Liam. This time, Liam met his eyes from across the cab for a beat.

He sighed, shook his head and the words seemed to come. Liam supposed he owed Theo some honesty after what he’d put him through. “When I was at Devenford, and Brett was the captain of the lacrosse team…” He stopped. Did it matter anymore? Brett was dead. But the memories weren’t. “He- he thought it was funny. He took some of the freshmen to the abandoned zoo. And he and a couple of older boys started… pounding on us. With lacrosse balls.” Liam was lost in the memory, felt himself on the hard ground of the barred cage, which still lingered with the scent of trapped animals. “I blacked out, woke up thinking I was trapped,” he added absently, eyes vacant on the dashboard in front of him. Swallowing hard, he leaned back into the present and laughed darkly, “Lacrosse balls hurt a lot more than 5 fists to the face, trust me.”

But Theo wasn’t laughing. “I figured as much,” He finally said, a soft shake of the head. 

“What do you mean?” Liam asked, brow creased.

“Why do you think I had to knock you out, like 5 times? You kept waking up, thinking you were trapped,” Theo said, eyes flickering to Liam, but quickly away. He pressed his lips together, and continued. “You’re not trapped. You- you don’t have to fill Scott’s place, or be the perfect alpha or whatever.”

Liam stared at him, but Theo was focused on the road. His understanding of the chimera unraveled more and more each day. Earlier at the zoo, he’d brushed Liam off, told him he wouldn’t care if he was killed. But later, when actual danger came around, he’d literally pulled Liam away despite the stubborn beta’s resistance. And he knew. Theo knew it wasn’t just Nolan who had him losing control, it was something else triggering him. 

But because Liam was stubborn, and maybe still feeling sorry for himself, he growled, “Why do you care?” 

“Why do you think, Liam?” Theo finally made eye contact with Liam; a piece of his hair had fallen over his eyes and his eyebrows furrowed angrily. “I- I don’t have anyone. The pack is disgusted by me, I have no family, I’m the one who's trapped, okay?” He pushed back his hair angrily, leaving it more unkempt than it was to start with. Liam had no idea how this related, but he could feel Theo’s desperation like a caged animal. “You’ve got it all, and I can’t stand for you to keep throwing it away, putting yourself in danger.” Now this was about Liam? But Theo wasn’t done. “And you know I can tell when you’re hurt… your chemosignals are pretty obvious, and it’s driving me crazy trapped in this car when it’s all I can smell.” Theo suddenly swerved onto the side of the empty road, opened his door and stepped out. 

Liam didn’t know what to do. How things changed so quickly he was unsure, but he felt his blood churning, the werewolf in him triggered by the accusations. Quickly, he got out and followed around the side of the truck, anger rising in him at the sight of Theo’s turned back.

“I’m sorry!” He called out angrily, not a hint of apology. “I guess I’ll leave you alone if you can’t stand me!” Liam stormed towards Theo and shoved him, who whipped around, instantly, back heaving with heavy breaths. Liam felt his fangs forming painfully, preparing for a fight.

“God, you really don’t get it do you!” Theo clutched at his hair, before releasing and slamming Liam into the side of the truck bed, pinning him there with the weight of his body. Through the red haze of his anger, Liam was shocked to see Theo’s eyes, suspiciously glassy in the moonlight. Those eyes, that had remained expressionless even as he took the lives of his own pack, glittering with tears, and even fear, proving he was still human. “It’s because I care about you, Liam! There, I said it.” Speechless, Liam stood panting against the edge of the truck, Theo’s forearms pressing down on his shoulders. Theo shook his head angrily, “Do I really need to spell it out? I could’ve left you to die after you wolfed out on Nolan, but I didn’t.” He sniffed loudly. “Maybe I should have.” 

“Theo,” Liam whispered, unsure where to start. Theo laughed, but it was laced with cynicism. 

“No, you don’t get to say anything,” Absently, Theo moved one of his hands to his own heart. “I survived getting my heart ripped out for months by my sister and I wish she’d just finished the job.”

Tentatively, Liam raised his own arm and placed a hand, bloody knuckles and all, over Theo’s at his heart. The boy looked up at him through shaken clumps of hair, and Liam swallowed. “My first girlfriend I met after accidentally punching her in the face,” Liam said, voice hoarse. “It took her years to forgive me.” His lips quirked at the memory, but the pain of losing Hayden wasn’t there like it once was. He intertwined his fingers with Theo’s, unsure of what to do. “And it might take you years to forgive me, but I think I can handle someone a little rough around the edges.”

Theo let out a huff of a laugh, and said almost disbelievingly, “You broke my nose.”

Liam felt a smile curling onto his face. “3 times.”

He was still pinned against the truck. With his other hand, Liam reached for Theo’s face, and before he could think too much about it, leaned upwards and kissed the boy on the lips. 

“What was that?” Theo whispered, ungracefully pulling a stray hair off of his lips. But the chimera didn’t look angry or particularly blood thirsty which Liam took as a good sign.

“I care about you, too,” Liam’s eyes flickered nervously to Theo. “And I know I make mistakes, and I’m not great with emotions, especially not talking about them, but just remember you’re not alone. You went along with my plan today, even knowing the risk. You stopped me from killing Nolan and helped anchor me when I lost control,” Liam took a deep breath before he said the last part, “If that’s not pack, it’s gotta be something more.” 

Liam looked up for Theo’s reaction; the older boy’s smug expression had almost returned in full. This time, Liam had no hesitations, rolling his eyes and kissing Theo deeply before pulling away to whisper, “And you ripped my t-shirt.” 

Theo smirked against Liam’s lips, and grabbed the boy’s waist, thumb sliding underneath the torn fabric to connect with hot skin. “It’s better that way,” he muttered, eyes locked on Liam’s. 

And tonight, Theo wasn’t worried about where he would spend the night or if the cops would find him or even where his next meal would come from. He wasn’t trapped anymore, confined to thoughts of survival. He simply embraced the broken werewolf in front of him, and let Liam’s lips melt away his thoughts. 

“I’m glad your heart is right where it is,” Liam whispered, and suddenly Theo knew that he couldn’t ever be truly alone again.

**Author's Note:**

> comments with any feedback would be greatly appreciated!!! this fandom needs more thiam 
> 
> wrote this while listening to Nobody Knows by Autograf ft. WYNNE, the song played during this scene in the episode. 
> 
> thanks for reading!


End file.
